How Not to be "Clubbed into Dank Submission"… Protecting Your Free-Spirit

Today a friend posted on facebook that her daughter asked her what does free-spirit mean. She then wrote: “Aaaahhh, how do you answer that when you miss it so much?”

This post made me terribly sad– why have we not been taught to protect our free spirit?

Last year I went to a delicious lecture by the scholar Ravi Ravindra. He spoke of how our method of education and parenting has created a culture of “non-learners”. Through our system of reward and punishment, children have lost their natural curiosity to explore the things they have a intrinsic interest in. By being told what is important to learn, or how to behave, who they become is driven by adults, whom sadly, have also have forgotten what it means to be a “free-spirit”.

Although we have grown to be what we’ve been told to be, and we focus on what we are told is important (job, mortgage, blah blah), our souls know we are more than this, that at a deep level we stir and crave to be true to our natural curiosities. Our spirits yearn to be free to do what we love.

And ignoring this deep knowing has created the great divide between how we think we should live vs. how we want to live. So many of us feel “trapped”. Feeling free has become packaged into week-long all inclusive vacations and “girl’s night out”.

Bukowski addresses this divide in his poem The Laughing Heart:

your life is your life
don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is a light somewhere.
it may not be much light but
it beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you chances.
know them.
take them.
you can’t beat death but
you can beat death in life, sometimes.
and the more often you learn to do it,
the more light there will be.
your life is your life.
know it while you have it.
you are marvelous
the gods wait to delight
in you.

So in response to my friend’s facebook post, I offer this:

Five Steps to protecting your “free-spirit”:

1- Rebel against the “to-do” list for at least a few minutes daily. Carve time for playdate with your soul. Meditate, breathe, sit at the ocean, take a walk in nature, take a bath. Practice free time for yourself.

2- Practice “not-minding” or deflecting what others think, say, or assume about you. Create your personal “force-field” of protection. (tip: when feeling judged by others, place one hand on your belly–to protect your core, the energy center of self-esteem and the other palm facing out)

3- surround yourself with others who are able to support your happiness. We all have great friends who come to the rescue when we are in need or down in the dumps. A true friend is one who can stand by you and support your joy and your successes.

4- Enjoy the abundance that already surrounds you-especially nature, children and the elderly.

5- Embrace the mystery. Do what delights you.  Make mistakes.  Follow your heart. Trust more in the natural order of things.